


From Wall Rose, With Love

by mercuriosities



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M, God why am I even posting these, Tumblr, collection of drabbles
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-18
Updated: 2014-07-18
Packaged: 2018-02-09 09:54:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1978476
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mercuriosities/pseuds/mercuriosities
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Collection of prompts, short stories, and various other writings from Tumblr. I figured this was as good a place to start as any. Mostly featuring such ships as: Petruo/Auretra, a smatterdash of Erdetra angst, and possibly later Eruri. Also, Jearmin, because Jearmin is life as the good Isayama-sensei said. The Levipetra BROTP is strong with this collection and will likely only get stronger as I add to it so if that for some reason offends you I'd slink away now.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Hack and Slash

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Petra's first interaction with Titans - and subsequently Captain Levi - leaves her with some big questions.

Petra's first kill left her more shaken than she wanted to admit.

It wasn’t that she was afraid - she was, but no more so than everyone else (at least she hoped - Auruo didn’t seem all that afraid but he always talked big, and Ilse always hid her emotions from just about everyone). It wasn’t even that she was squeamish. Karanese district was famous for its butchers, so she’d grown up around a lot of raw meat. No - Petra had seen death before, in chickens and pigs and even cows, and she knew with the clarity of she who had grown up halfway on a farm that death was an inevitable part of life.

It was more that when she landed on her feet and the Titan fell in front of her, they made eye contact for a split second before its body started to decay into steam - and in that split second she could swear the thing was intelligent. Sentient.

Human.

She stumbled backward and resisted, resisted,  _resisted_ falling to her knees right then because  _this is still a battle, Petra, you can’t all apart yet, what would your mother say -_ and with shaking hands, forced her fingers to tighten on the triggers of her maneuver gear. She shot toward the rooftops, boots clattering on the clay tiles, and surveyed the surrounding area with wide amber eyes.

She would kill two more titans in that battle before receiving the order to fall back, and she would lose at least ten more friends and members of her graduating class. It would be another three hours before she could stumble to the latrines outside the Women’s Barracks and throw up the contents of her stomach. 

\- - -

"Cadet Ral."

Petra let the door to the latrine swing shut behind her as she stepped out - but the voice that fell upon her ears gave her pause.

Then her eyes widened and she turned around - no, her ears were sharp and they had not lied to her. Humanity’s Golden Hero stood about four paces away, hands clasped behind his back, a crisp white jabot fixed around his neck.

If there were any time for Lance Corporal Levi to see her, it was  _not_ right now.

She fought her shame and affected a salute. He waved a hand, dismissing her. “At ease,” he murmured, voice low and neutral as ever. “I would speak with you, if I may.”

"Sir," she nodded, and swallowed hard, and fell into step with the corporal as he began to walk forward. Her mouth still tasted sour, her eyes still burned from the battle, from the vomiting, from embarrassment.

"You were a member of the 100th graduating class, yes?"

"Yes sir," she confirmed. Had it been nearly a year? Some days it felt like she had graduated yesterday. Today it felt like she had been fighting for centuries.

"Your skill today was instrumental in saving lives."

Petra paused in her step, wondering if she had misheard. “Sir?”

Levi paused as well, and turned to her. “You do not believe me?”

"Sir, I -" How, exactly, was she supposed to respond to praise from a man she both idolized and feared? His abrasive personality was legendary, as was his prowess in battle. And he was saying that  _she_ had saved lives?

"Three titans down - a seven meter, a ten meter, and one aberrant nine meter class. Those are not modest numbers."

"I was only doing my job, sir." It felt like a lie - she just hadn’t wanted to die. She just hadn’t wanted to lose more friends. Her ‘job’ felt like a sham on the battlefield. She hadn’t fought for humanity. She’d fought for her own life.

She felt selfish. The Lance Corporal wasn’t afraid of death - but she was. She was terrified.

"Were you? I wonder." He tilted his head to one side and considered her with his unsettling grey eyes. Her stomach flipped over and she wondered exactly what he was measuring about her. Whatever it was, she did not feel like she met his standards. Her eyes fell to the ground, and they stung again with bright, unshed tears.

"Cadet Ral -"

"But regardless of how many I killed -" The words slipped from her mouth, unbidden, hot like the blood that her compatriots had coughed up as their ribs broke, as their lungs were crushed, as the titans bit down on them. Levi paused, surprised at her interruption.

"It doesn’t matter, does it? Not really, because even if I saved lives, I didn’t save enough. Even if I killed titans, there are going to be more. And -" She looked at her hands which had been covered in the blood of her friends, of fallen comrades whom she could not save. "I have to keep going, for them, but I can’t help but think… this is all pointless, isn’t it? I’ll probably die too one day, and I am —"

"Terrified." The corporal finished for her, his arms crossed in front of his chest. "Cadet Ral, are you done?" She nodded, ashamed of her outburst - Levi, however, seemed almost thoughtful, and continued after a long moment of silence.

"Yes, you are terrified. You’d be a fucking idiot if you weren’t."

Yellow eyes lifted from the ground and collided hard with gray.

"Fear keeps your actions in check. And it makes you human. Too many people lose that humanity. Even if they don’t die, they become something else."

He wrinkled his nose as he spoke. “War is fucking disgusting. This war, in particular, is disgusting. But people like you can bring a little light to it. Don’t lose that, Cadet Ral.”

He paused, clearly finished, then turned on his heel. “Drink some water. Take care of yourself.”

Petra stared after him, utterly unsure of what had just happened.

\- - -

It would be another two weeks before Lance Corporal Levi put through an official request to have Petra Ral transferred to his Special Operations squad. When Commander Erwin Smith notified her at dinner, the 100th graduating class broke into applause, and Petra dropped her coffee cup in shock.


	2. Bitter Oranges

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little bit of Petruo fluff for the Santa Claus in all of us.

He calls her ‘Tangerine,’ and she really hates it.

He calls her a number of things - ‘babe,’ ‘honey,’ ‘minx,’ 'nag,' or even ‘witch,’ if they’re arguing, and she really can’t stand the little pet-names. But she hates ‘tangerine’ most of all.

And she knows that’s why he does it, because it irks her and because as much as it annoys him to have her around on the squad, the only thing he hates more than being usurped is being ignored. And Petra has honed ignoring Auruo into a fine-tuned skill. But when he throws around ‘tangerine,’ her hands clench into fists and she grits her teeth and has to count backward from ten, slowly, and exhale through her nose, and he laughs a bit to himself because he’s snagged another minor victory in their verbal cold war.

Even after a year he still doesn’t give her any room to relax, but by the time the weather turns cold again she’s almost grown used to it. Sometimes she still makes his coffee cold or too-bitter, or ‘forgets’ to bring out the cream and sugar so he has to drink it black and grimace all the while. By then, though, it’s routine, and she’s not sure how she would start her day anymore without firing volleys at Auruo. Besides, he never disappoints. He always fires back.

And even when she’s trying to be nice, he drives her completely up the walls. She had already managed to secure gifts for the rest of her squad - a clean jabot for Heichou, fruit tea for Erd because he liked Karanese tea the best, and a block of dark, sweet chocolate for Gunther. Simple, comfortable gifts that would make the cold, hard days in 3dmg a little easier to weather. But Auruo, ever-difficult Auruo, ever-snide-and-snippy-Auruo was being just as snide-and-snippy in her brain and refusing to offer up any information as to what would be a good gift.

She’d already tossed aside ideas of coffee, or another cravat - she didn’t want to encourage him to imitate Heichou more than he already was - and he didn’t like sweet chocolate like Gunther or fruit tea like Erd and  _by the height of Maria, why was he always so damned difficult?_

She idly, slowly turned her coffee mug in her hands as the rest of the squad bickered comfortably around her, trying to convince a recalcitrant Heichou to let them throw a combined birthday-Christmas party. He was, predictably, wholly against the idea.

Then she felt an elbow in her ribs and glanced up with a glare.

"Oi, tangerine," said the offending man with a sly grin. "Are ya gonna meet me under the mistletoe this year or will you spend another whole year pinin’ for me?"

Her eyes narrowed slightly at the nickname. 

"You’re delusional," she responded and rolled her eyes, and stood up to bring her coffee mug to the kitchen. As laughter rolled out from the dining hall she slipped out into the hallway, and headed back to her room - now, at least, she had a small idea blooming in the back of her head.

 

\- - -

 

He called her tangerine because she hated it, because she’d clench her fists and glare at him and sometimes that was the only time she’d even look at him at all. He called her ‘tangerine’ because it meant she was paying attention to him, that she was thinking about him, and because he didn’t know how else to get under her skin. 

He hated it when she ignored him, couldn’t stand it - how could it be fair, if he thought about her all the goddamn time?

So he needled at her because it meant that, at the very least, he was on her mind.

Still, when Christmas rolled around, he was worried - Auruo didn’t have a lot of money so he did what he could in terms of gifts, but he knew it would not measure up to anything else she could have received. The girl may not have been wealthy but she did come from the better part of Karanese, which automatically meant she was a few steps up the social graces ladder than he was.

Shit, he still didn’t know why she joined the goddamn Survey corps. She was ruining his goddamn life. Hadn’t she been in the top ten of her class? Why wasn’t she in the Military Police? The girl was like a princess. A terrifying auburn-haired princess who could match him jab for jab and was just about as good as he was at titan killing.

Sure, he mused, he was glad she was around, sort of, but one of these days she was going to get hurt or killed and then where would they all be?

Because she’d wormed her way into the collective heart of the Levi squad, and now Auruo wasn’t sure if they could survive without her sarcasm, her coffee, her warm smiles or soft, soft voice.

She really was ruining his life.

All of this flitted through his head at the Survey Corps Christmas party - which Hanji and Mike had thrown with Erwin’s permission and against Levi’s loud protests - as he sipped a mug of hot cocoa and watched her laugh with Eren. (And how had that kid managed to get so close to her already? Damn him.)

There was mistletoe hanging in the main doorway, but he’d been avoiding it after Hanji had given Levi a loud smooch on the cheek. Heichou had been so thoroughly traumatized that he hadn’t been able to verbally respond, and just rushed to the bathroom to wipe at the lipstick the squad leader had been wearing.

He stood up, walked over.

"Oi, tangerine," he started, and she turned, too amused to even be properly mad at him.

"Oh, Auruo, it’s Christmas. Can’t you just call me Petra?"

He paused, and his eyes softened - just a little bit.

"Sure, Petra. I guess. ‘Cause it’s Christmas."

She smiled -  _actually fucking smiled at him, for once_ \- and pulled a small wrapped box off the top of the pile under the Christmas tree. “Here, this is for you.”

"Y-you got me a -?"

"Well, sure. You might be a complete jerk most of the time but you’re still on the squad, and you’ve saved my life more times than I can count." Pragmatic as ever, Petra lifted a shoulder in a shrug. "Besides, you got me peppermint chocolate."

He had, in fact, and was really proud of himself, because he’d spent months poking around trying to figure out which candy was her favorite. Lucky for him, Hanji liked to gossip.

"Well, I thought you might like it, since you’re so damn cold all the time."

She laughed at that - a warm sound that bubbled from her lips, that Auruo never got tired of hearing - and reached up to pat him on the shoulder.

"Merry Christmas, Auruo."

—-

She didn’t kiss him under the mistletoe that night, but that ended up being alright - because he waited to open her gift until he got back to his room and when he did he felt his heart melt like the snow outside when faced with one of her auburn-sun smiles. The gift was a jar of Karanese Orange marmalade, carefully wrapped, and with a cinnamon stick tied on top.

And there was a card penned in her careful, neat script - 

"To Auruo. Merry Christmas, from your Tangerine."

He thought then, idly, as he twisted open the jar and the pungent scent of citrus rind filled his room, that bitter oranges might end up becoming his favorite fruit after all.


	3. All That's Left.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leonimum on Tumblr asked me what I thought would happen if everyone on Squad Levi BUT GUNTER had survived the encounter with the female titan. The thought gave me lots of painful feelings so of course I had to write some fic about it.
> 
> This one features some hurt/comfort Erdetra, which I was experimenting with at the time.

“Erd Gin, you goddamn  _asshole!”_

The blonde halted on his heel, military training coupling with anger and keeping his movements so crisp they were almost inhuman. How he could still move, train, talk - he didn’t know. His best friend, his brother in arms, the closest thing he even had to god-damned family anymore was gone and now Erd’s body was moving through his daily routine while his brain tried to break the surface of an ocean of grief. And instead, he was drowning.

But the fire, the hurt and  _fury_ in Petra’s voice shot through that endless sea like a god-given savior. Or something like that, if he’d been given to poetry.

He wasn’t going to say it didn’t sting because it did, but he couldn’t look at her without thinking about Gunter. He couldn’t look at that empty seat at the dinner table right next to her, couldn’t notice the copper in her hair without thinking about how his almost-brother’s dark fingers would comb through it.

Gunter wasn’t given to displays of affection but Petra brought that out in all of them.

So of course he’d shoved her away. What else was he supposed to do?

The tiny redhead had, apparently, followed him after his silent exit from the mess hall. He hadn’t expected her to, but there she was. She’d always been full of surprises.

“You may think you can deal with this alone, you piece of shit, but maybe it’s about time you remembered that you have a goddamn squad that  _was_ left alive.”

“You made that clear.” His voice was cold, his dark gaze cutting and sharp. And the way he looked at her - like she wasn’t  _anything_ \- made Petra sick to her stomach.

“So you walk out on us?”

“I had nothing more to say.”

Petra’s breath caught and staggered from her throat, cutting at the emotions that sat there and kept her from swallowing. She wanted to cry. She got angry instead.

“You- you—“

“Me?” The smirk that tugged at Erd’s mouth was a terrible corruption of his usual arrogant grin. Petra couldn’t help but wonder if Erd had died back in the forest as well, and they’d only been given a poor substitution.

“If you walk away from me here, Erd, you’d better not come back.”

He sucked in a breath and stood up straighter. “Excuse me?”

“Don’t come back.” She matched him, gaze for gaze, sharp posture for posture. “Don’t you dare come back. If you walk out on your squad now you don’t deserve to be a part of us.”

He snapped backward like she had punched him, and gritted his teeth.

“You have no goddamn right to say that -“

“I have all the right in the world, or what’s left of it.” She clenched her hands into fists as she shouted back. “I have all the right when you,  _you_  - you’re our second in command, our leader when Heichou’s gone - and Heichou’s been gone, Erd! Where have you been? You’ve been shoving us all into a corner and pretending we don’t exist!”

“Gunter is  _dead_ , Petra! Dead! He’s not coming back!”

“And from the way you’re acting you  _clearly_ wish it had been Auruo and me instead!”

“I would  _never_ wish that on you!” He roared in response, hand cutting sharply through the air as if to slice her suggestion in half. “And to hell with you for even thinking it.”

When Erd yelled, which was rare, the world seemed to jump and fall into line - but not Petra. She stared that unnerving golden stare straight back at him, her mouth pressed into a thin, thin line.

“Then  _fucking_ act like you mean it, Gin.”

The use of his last name cut him deeper than the swear, and the scabbed-over wound that he’d nursed so closely ripped back open again. Because it hadn’t just been Gunter - he’d lost Gunter, and that was killing him, but he’d watched Petra get slammed against a tree and Auruo get flattened against the ground and nobody then knew if they were going to make it out alive.

“ _Fuck_   _you_ , Petra -“

And in two long strides he had her against the wall and his mouth was crushing down on hers, hot and messy, teeth scraping against her lips as he  _demanded_ a response.

And she did; she kissed him back, biting down on his own bottom lip as she fought against his grip. One hand broke from his grasp and slid up his shoulder to tangle and tug harshly at his hair. He hissed and pulled back for a second, changing his grip to pull her away from the wall and hold her flush and hot against him before biting back down on her mouth.

It wasn’t the first time he had kissed her, not by a long shot, but it was the first time a kiss between them had been anything but sweet.

\- - -

Petra pulls away for a second and gasps - “Erd, hallway -“  enough that the words manage to cut through his fury and  _he is still angry at her, that’s not gone anywhere_ \- but he realizs that the corridor is a public space and the last thing he needs is Eren or Auruo happening upon this altercation. 

So he turns again and grabs her by the wrist before veritably hauling her the few short meters toward his bedroom. He opens the wooden door and swings her forward before stepping into the room himself and locking the door behind him. She raises an eyebrow but doesn’t question it, and instead just crosses her arms.

“Take that back,” he says, his voice dark with anger and something else entirely, something she can’t quite recognize. “Goddamn it, Petra - Take it  _back._ “

Ah, she realizes, with a jolt. It’s anguish.

So this time, when she steps forward, she takes his hands in her own and holds them tight. This time, she kisses him.

It happens slowly, and for the first few moments he does not move against her and she wonders if the previous kiss was a fluke and she has once again misjudged her boundaries with the second-in-command of her squad. But then he releases her hands from his grasp and she  _feels_ something in him shatter, and his arms come around her waist and hold her tight - like she’s the last thing in the world he can possibly cling to as everything else breaks apart.

And maybe she is.

She pulls away from the kiss again and tastes salt on her lips, but she can’t even get a word in before Erd is curling around her and great, heaving sobs are wracking his body.


End file.
